5 Things That Are Easier Said Than Done
#5) Get out more: Have you been outside? Do you know who's outside? People and germs are outside. People who hate their lives and have poor hygiene love to be outside. If my house were a mess (spiritual, financial, physical, etc.), I wouldn't want to sit in it either. If you're an extroverted introvert, you will love being out and feeling included for all of about 20 minutes to an hour. After that you start to feel like "this was cute, and I'm ready to go." If you're an overthinker, you spent more time getting ready and hyping yourself up to go out, than the time you actually spend out. If you have extreme anxiety, you have an extensive pros and cons list that convinces you that you get hit by a random bus while you're out. If you're all three, chances are you're staying in. You are still worthy and deserving of love.
#4) Learn a new skill: I am convinced that people do not know the definition of a skill. Skills take years to truly master with care and humility. Coding bootcamps and the rise of the people who seem to get rich quick has everyone thinking they can just master any skill and make a profit. That is not how skills work. New skills do not magically transform your life if they don't mesh with who are either. Communicating effectively is a skill, coupled with high emotional intelligence. If you a cashier or co-worker has been less than kind to you, and it DID NOT escalate into an altercation, and you DID NOT take it out on someone else later... chances are you have talent. You may even be a guru. If you started working on a skill and stopped or bought knitting needles and yarn that you never used, you are still worthy and deserving of love.
#2) Find God/Increase your faith: I've done a quick skip of the Bible and there were a lot of stories written by dudes in there. Also, are we not going to talk about how The Old Testament just hit different? Which god am I following? The idea of finding a deeper meaning for your life is absolutely valid. The truth of the matter still remains that we may find James or Brenda in church first claiming to be servants of the Lordt and they rock your world. Is it a test? Is it part of the journey because "faith isn't easy," probably. Therapists are still helpful in that faith walk too. Whether you find that journey or decide to walk another way, you are still worthy and deserving of love.
 |
| Photo Credit: Diana Simumpande, IG @diana.sim |
#1) Love/work on yourself: Stop telling single people they need to work/focus on them first. People are/have been in relationships they had no business being in just so they can later say, "but look at us now." Not every person is willing to suffer for love. Even if the research bears out that happy, healthy people always find each other before 30 and end up happily ever after, why would you want to rush the process for someone else? Also, just because someone may want to have a little boo or go on a baecation does not automatically mean they don't love themselves. If anything, it means they haven't found someone who loves them as much they do. They also could just in the wrong location. I used to live in a state with a Black population of roughly 4%. The single Black men out of that 4% rarely dated anyone darker than unfinished pine. Interracial relationships are trendy, and we put #RelationshipGoals on things we know nothing about. Even Michelle Obama brought her mama to the White House because people need different types of support outside of their partner. Whether you fix your bad habits or not, you are still worthy and deserving of love.
 |
| Photo Credit: Jeffery Erhunse |
Bottom Line: We're all doing the best we can, with what we've got - shoutout to Mariah. This thing called life is hard. You may even be successfully working through everything on this list, but it's a commitment to stick to it every day. No matter how you walk or what simple pleasures you find, it's enough. You are still worthy and deserving of love.